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Submitted on
November 23, 2013
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you are

metaphorically beautiful--

what do I mean by that?

you are the bonfire in the summer sand

in the setting sun. you are the setting sun

when the flames align with the horizon;

your eyelash touches are a thousand

wishes coming true in a single breath.

you are yesterday today and tomorrow

all in a kiss, a constant reminder that life 

isn’t so bad so unfair so impossible to live.

but

I forget reality in your eyes--

I mean literally, 

you are not a bonfire. you set the bonfire.

and you’re not a flame, only attached to the finger

passing across it in a dangerous tease. you are

eyelashes and breaths and lips but you are also

synapses misfiring and calling me the love of your

life who you do not mean. you have life in you

but you are not life and 

there is something beyond you.

someone else beyond you

that I must reach for and I must,

in the name of her,

imagine new metaphors.

Add a Comment:
 
:iconflummo:
flummo Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2014  Student Writer
Absolutely love the turnaround. :heart:
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
aw, glad you did :D
Reply
:icontales-of-tao:
Tales-of-Tao Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013  Student General Artist
I tried to pick my favorite line from this, but it isn't going to happen. As usual, your words capture me from beginning to end. This is gorgeous; the words fit the mood so well.
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
wow, thank you! ^^
I'm glad you liked it as much
Reply
:icontales-of-tao:
Tales-of-Tao Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013  Student General Artist
You're welcome. :)
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2013  Student Writer
well, I totally flattered myself into thinking this was a se/prequel to one of my poems and wanted to kill you for making it better than mine. :stare:

this is beautiful, G, the concept in itself is so lovely. I love how the beginning and ending are connected in a way I didn't expect.
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
which poem was it again? who knows, y-m, you're definitely
inspire my work. and this is not better than anything you write!
blashemy! :stare:

thank you so much :blushes: I'm glad it was a bit unexpected.
Reply
:iconyour-methamphetamine:
your-methamphetamine Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2013  Student Writer
uhh, I forgot now but I had one in mind when I wrote that down. ohh psssh, that's a blasphemy. you write plenty better.

of course!
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
no, I really don't. even the things you write that you proclaim are shitty are better than mine stuff.
Reply
:iconayeaye12:
AyeAye12 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2013  Student Writer
"metaphorically beautiful

what do I mean by that?" 

I think "beautiful" should have a full stop, as otherwise it just comes off as being too fast paced and clunky. 
Punctuation could also be placed in "...with the horizon /your eyelash touches..." to make the piece smooth. 
If you were going for a fast pace, then that is understandable, but commas or full-stops would help in technicality.

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